Q: What do you call a vampire with asthma?

A: Vlad the Inhaler


Q: Why do vampires stay away from Applebees on Wednesdays?

A: Because it’s stake night.


Q: What happened when Jack the Pumpkin King fell asleep on the sunbed?

A: He got a skele-tan.


Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

A: Frostbite.


Q: What do you call a 7 foot, 300lb werewolf?

A: Sir.


Q: Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

A: Because you can see right through them.


Q: Why didn’t the ghost go to the party?

A: He had no body to go with.


Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?

A: No, they eat their fingers separately.


Q: What do you call a zombie with no arms and no legs lying on the front porch?

A: Matt.


Q: Why do the un-dead like honey?

A: They think it’s made by zom-bees.


Q: What did the zombie eat after its teeth were pulled out?

A: The dentist.


Q: What do zombies say when they take a bite out of you?

A: I want amor.


Q: Why did the Vampire read The New York Times?

A: He heard it had great circulation.


Q: Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?

A: He didn’t have a haunting license


Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist.


Q: Why is Superman’s costume so tight?

A: Because he wears a size “S.”


Q: What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

A: Do you believe in humans?


Q: What is a ghost’s favorite pie?

A: Booberry pie.


Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

A: He didn’t have the guts.


Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

A: Hope it’s Halloween!


Q: What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes?

A: They bite!


Happy Halloween everyone!

p.s. Remember to keep everyone safe while Trick or Treating. Make safety fun with light up costumes, glow sticks, and flashlights!

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